Jennifer Biery's Blog (16)

Hoochie Mama?

It's hard to believe that I'll be 35 tomorrow. When I was a kid—and even in my early twenties—35 sounded ridiculously "grown up," and 40 seemed positively ancient. Yet here I am, feeling perfectly fine about the milestone.

I probably wouldn't be making much of…

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Added by Jennifer Biery on May 20, 2012 at 11:30pm — No Comments

My Memories and the Eiffel "Cow"er

As we wrapped up our trip to Paris, I found myself longing for some souvenir of my crazy adventure. I had been fantasizing about finding a quaint little boutique where I could buy some ridiculously expensive French hand lotion made out of rare…

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Added by Jennifer Biery on May 4, 2012 at 10:29pm — No Comments

The Potty and the Pussycat

I was there—I was finally in Paris! It was the morning of my first full day in France, and after the horrific…

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Added by Jennifer Biery on April 22, 2012 at 10:00pm — No Comments

Fight or Flight...to Paris!

I sat at the airport, fighting to gulp down the firmest (and most expensive) "pretzel bites" I had ever encountered. I had spent the whole week vacillating between frantic worrying and manic excitement, and I was aware that I was eating way too fast. I couldn't help myself...I was…

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Added by Jennifer Biery on April 6, 2012 at 4:30pm — No Comments

Freaks of Nature

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Well, I have just returned from my weekend in France, and my head is spinning with all the crazy stories I have to tell. Regardless of where I travel, I seem to bring my own special brand of bad…

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Added by Jennifer Biery on March 16, 2012 at 3:18pm — No Comments

Strange Brew

I'm not a big fan of the mall—mostly because I tend to have horrible experiences there. I frequently get hoodwinked by enthusiastic salespeople who sell me junk I don't need and never use, and I have had enough dressing room blunders to write an entire book of anecdotes on fitting…

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Added by Jennifer Biery on February 21, 2012 at 11:27pm — No Comments

Broke Butt Mountain

Misadventures in Motherhood: Broke Butt Mountain

Most people have love-hate relationships with their bodies, and I'm no different—although it's not for the reasons one might think. I don't hate the stretch marks that I bear as a result of having my children, and I don't get too upset over the venetian-blind…

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Added by Jennifer Biery on February 8, 2012 at 11:52pm — No Comments

Fowl Play

Misadventures in Motherhood....

Fowl Play

My husband is considering nominating me for the show "Worst Cooks in America," and I think I may actually have quite a…

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Added by Jennifer Biery on January 13, 2012 at 4:30pm — No Comments

Till Death Do Us Barf

Misadventures in Motherhood: Till Death Do Us Barf

Weddings are wonderful, festive, life-changing, and occasionally disastrous events. I suppose Forrest Gump's famous line could apply to them, in that you never know what you're gonna get.

I was absolutely thrilled when my best friend asked me to be Matron of Honor in her New Year's Eve…

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Added by Jennifer Biery on January 6, 2012 at 12:02am — No Comments

I'm a Naughty Little Santa!

Misadventures in Motherhood: I'm a Naughty Little…

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Added by Jennifer Biery on December 21, 2011 at 6:18pm — No Comments

Who Wants a New Vajayjay for Christmas?

Misadventures in Motherhood: Who Wants a New Vajayjay for Christmas?

I don't consider myself a fickle person, but unfortunately I have a bizarre tendency to adopt ridiculous fads once I've been exposed to them long enough. Take capri pants, for…

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Added by Jennifer Biery on December 2, 2011 at 7:17pm — No Comments